How We Treat Our Family Members With Special Needs Can Make or Break Them
February 27, 2017Autism, Dealing with a Child with Autism, Reflections,
Bunso is under the supervision of his therapists and SpEd teachers for two years. He still feels very excited to go to school to learn with his teachers and classmates and it shows that he is well taken cared of and being loved by them.
I still can remember the time that he was diagnosed with Mild Autism Spectrum Disorder. He was non-responsive, speechless, rowdy, and impatient. He would usually throw tantrums, shout or cry restlessly, or wouldn't stay in one place for a long time both in private or public. Due to his routinary behavior and volatile temper, we would end up physically and emotionally exhausted at the end of each day.
Aside from dealing with Bunso's wholistic development, we encountered financial difficulties along the way. His therapy sessions, education, and daily expenses are expensive. It was never easy and will never be easy to support a child with special needs. In short, our family and I know that other families with members with special needs are experiencing huge changes when talking about family mechanics and setting priorities.
We are so blessed that our dear Bunso belongs to the upper spectrum which means that he is highly functional. His hyperactivity is encompassing but he learns fast and adapts well to his environment. We are so glad that he can now express himself through words and actions, not that much yet but he is doing his best. He can follow instructions, become more affectionate, start engaging in interactive play, read words, write numbers and letters, draw simple objects, identify things, and helps at home and school.
I must say that I and the people that we know who usually don't see him often observe positive changes in him and also see him do antics that kids like his case do but it's okay. What we find important is we keep on supporting him and guiding him to reach his full potential. As days come and go, each step with him becomes more challenging but it boils down to four things on how we manage the situation. First, WE ACCEPT HIM FOR WHO HE IS. We don't compare him to other kids. We know that he is unique like the rest of us. Our genuine acceptance, we believe, makes him acceptable for all. We are open with his condition and it makes him more accepted and loved if not by all, but by most people around him. Second, WE TREAT HIM NORMALLY. We don't give him special treatment. We talk to him and deal with him like we do to the other members of the family. Third, WE BELIEVE THAT HE CAN. Like any person, may be normal in our societal standards or with special needs, we know that he can live a normal life independently and he can be successful in anything that he chooses to be in the future.
One of the things that we encourage him to do is to follow his passion according to his own pace. We don't pressure him at all. He is now into playing educational games, solving easy and difficult puzzles (Yes, he can solve puzzles that adults here at home can't.), painting, reading story books for children, and helping do the chores.
His most favorite chore is laundering clothes and he knows all the steps especially the moment when it's time to put fabric conditioner without looking at the washing machine's timer. His senses are highly sensitive. By just hearing the flow of water, he knows when to do it. He also loves helping me cook. I really, really like it when he helps me because he is such a perfectionist in a peculiar way. I admit that he can do things better than I can sometimes and it makes me happy.
Lastly, WE ARE ALWAYS HERE FOR HIM. With me as an exception because I am taking care of him full time, Paps and Kuya always give time for him despite of spending more time in work and school respectively. Constant communication through words and actions is very important with family members with special needs. We talk to Bunso, hug and kiss him, and we show him that he is being loved and accepted by us and in return, people around him love and accept him which make him confident to face the world without inhibitions. We make sure that Paps and I do "parenting" instead of only "herding". We "date" him and his Kuya in separate occasions so that they can feel that they are special. We see to it that we also spend time together as a family. It doesn't matter where we are, as long as we are making good memories.
We don't know when Bunso shall overcome the challenges of his condition. What we do now is what we believe can determine his future.
0 comments
Thanks for stopping by!
I would love to know your feedback!