All-Around Pinay Mama

Hey, I'm Still Here!

December 08, 2014

How "The Undo List by Alu Aluzan-Aran" Changed Me

June 21, 2014

I was rigid and perfectionist before I read the article "The Undo List by Alu Aluzan-Aran" (pp.84-85) on Working Mom Magazine November 2013 issue. My friends would tease me and say that I was the ultimate OC (Obsessive Compulsive) of all. The article turned me around. It changed the way I looked into my routines - as a mom who pushes herself to the limits, who wants everything get covered by the dot, and changing the schedule would make the day quite unpleasant.

I also remembered the time when I was still teaching. I would carry with me a small notebook where my so called "Things to Do" list was written. My co-teacher, Mrs. Tin-Tin Alcala would tell me, "O, ano? Magagawa mo ba lahat ng nakasulat diyan?" ("Hey, what? Can you do all the things written there?") I would just shrug my shoulders and laugh about it. At the end of the day, I would miss three to four activities. I was too hard on myself then. I would feel bad if something was missed. Then I would include those missed activities on my next day routines. The same pattern would happen over and over until I got burned out.

I didn't learn from that experience. I still did the same thing when my first child was born. I would still sit down and write all the things that I had to do for the day. Hubby would tell me, "Ma, you have to be flexible. You are not a machine. You have to admit that you get tired and you need to rest. Don't be too hard on yourself. You're a great mom! Remember that."

As years passed, I learned to be a little flexible. But the eagerness of becoming a SUPER MOM continued.

After reading the article, I realized these:

1 There's nothing wrong if I pause for a while and give time for myself.

"Thirty minutes can change your day."

Honestly, I would feel guilty when I stop doing my motherly duties. I would feel like stealing time from my family.

Yes, it's true. We, moms, should have a daily me-time or appointment with ourselves that could be anytime between 30 minutes to two hours. It's time to maybe take a nap, do some crafting, read a chapter or two of our favorite novel, exercise, take a leisurely bath, meditate, or do something that we really like.

2 I should lessen my expectations and do what is best at the moment.

"There are seasons which will impact over time and can be confusing."

I have less me-time due to the demands of my very young children. It's not possible at the moment for me to review, take the Nursing Licensure Exams, and start a nursing career.

I learned to accept it and believed that it would pass and I would have my time someday.

3 I must know my priorities.

Following a "To Do List" drove me crazy in the past. It controlled me. It made me unable to focus on what was more important. I was physically at home taking care of everything but I was mentally absent, worrying about the future. I was hurrying to have a career outside our home, to grow professionally, not considering the fact that my kids still needed me. I wasn't contented of having a small business while taking care of my family.

When my kids got sick, I appreciated my being WAHM. They should be my topmost priority.

4 It's okay to slow down.

I love multitasking. It could make me finish all my daily tasks. But is this necessary all the time?

"It is important to be firm and single-minded when it comes to taking care of our personal needs, and using the time to do only the chores and tasks that matter to us and our family. Everything else is secondary."

HAPPY & CALM MOM = HAPPY & CALM FAMILY

Now I am more relaxed, contented, and happy with my spontaneous life as a mom. I don't care if I'm not able to finish everything in a day. After all, there's another day to look forward to. I just take a deep breath, smile, and say, "I know what matters most. Everything's gonna be okay."

Happy Mother's Day!

May 10, 2014

Teachable Moment: Honesty is the Best Policy

November 10, 2013

Last August 2013, my husband composed an e-mail to CEM (Center for Education Measurement) stating that he was following up the approval of his submitted test items that he made about Grade 3 Science for next year's Achievement Test. His e-mail was immediately acknowledged and he was informed that the test items were approved.

I: "Papa, it's finally done! Congratulations! Did you delete the soft copy?"

Hector: "Yes, Ma! It's done!"

Kuya Ross: "Mama, what is Papa doing? What soft copy did he delete? What is it all about?"

I: "Anak, Papa was invited by CEM to write test items about Grade 3 Science to be taken by students in the Philippines. According to the contract, once those test items were submitted to CEM, Papa should delete both his soft and hard copies and he did it!"

Kuya Ross: "How would they know if Papa really deleted them? They were not looking?"

I: " Anak, we have to be honest. Being honest means you should be true to your words and actions. You have to do the right thing even if nobody or regardless who is looking. The test that Papa made will be taken by you too next year. Papa could have saved a copy for you so that you'd know the answers but he didn't because that was cheating! Cheating is wrong, right? What he did was he kept his promise to CEM and followed the contract."

Kuya Ross: "Oh, I see."

I: " When you see money in your classroom, will you keep it?"

Kuya Ross: "No, Mama. I will give it to my teacher so that she can ask or look for the owner of the money."

I: "Very good! It's the same as what Papa did. It's an act of honesty. When we are honest, Kuya, people will trust us. God will be happy too because we are doing the right thing."

Kuya Ross: "Yes, Mama. I'm so proud of Papa."

I: "We are proud of you too, Kuya. You have to keep it in mind so that when you are already a dad, you'd know how to teach your kids."

Kuya Ross: "Yes, Mama. Thanks!"

The smile on his face showed that he was happy with what his Papa did.

Experience is really the best teacher at the right place and time.

Courtesy: http://www.nadiyahvidsten.com

Our Three Basic Rules for Our Son's School Success

November 08, 2013

I worked as a grade school teacher in an exclusive school for boys for five years before I decided to be a stay-at-home-mom. I've seen students excel and fail. I felt proud when my students excel because it meant that my mode of teaching was effective but my heart broke to see some of my students fail after doing different interventions to help them.

Frankly speaking, I understood more the situation and feelings of my students when my eldest son, Ross, started to attend school.

I realized that school pays an important part in students' development but parents' behavior have a greater impact in their children's behavior towards school.

Our children is the reflection of our behavior and attitude--- the way we treat others, our concept of right and wrong, the consistency of our actions with our words, our ways of dealing with anger, and most importantly, the way we give expectations.

According to Mimi Hudson, Director of Community Programs, Family Services of North Shore, parental expectations affect our children's motivational and self-expectations. Our children succeed if given realistic expectations and they fail when faced with unrealistically high expectations. Their failure is due to pressure, anxiety, and discouragement when they don't live up with their parents' expectations.

In line with this, there were moments when my husband and I talked about how we were raised by our parents. To cut the story short, we realized that we enjoyed school and succeed because our parents guided us well.

To help Ross enjoy school and succeed too, we set three basic school rules for him. We still remind him everyday to follow these rules before sending him off to school. We also ask him to repeat them as we speak so that he would remember them by heart. What is good about him is he never complains and does his best to practice them.

1) BE GOOD

"One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself."---Confucius, Golden Rule

^{We say that..."If you are good to others, they would be good to you. But if you are bad to others, they would be bad to you."}

^We^{always remind him to treat everybody with respect, kindness, gentleness, patience, and courtesy. He must be grateful when people treat him kindly. He has to use "Magic Words" (polite expressions) in talking to his classmates, friends, teachers, and other members of the school community.}

^{We teach him the importance of sharing by offering his food during recess and lunch time or lending his school materials in case one of his classmates forgot to bring his own.}^{It is also nice for him to take an active part in giving his time and resources in outreach programs and activities. When his classmates ask for help, he should be ready to give a helping hand.}

^{He must religiously follow the}^{"Clean As You Go" campaign in school. He should help in keeping his surroundings clean to lessen the load of the staff in keeping the whole school clean and tidy.}

^{In group activities, he must see to it that each of his classmates have a share in the doing work.}

^{He must}^{act like a gentleman too. As early as now, we teach him proper decorum in public and ways of showing high regard to the elderly and women.}

^{2) DO YOUR BEST}

^{"Follow excellence and success will chase you..."---}^{Ranchoddas Chadchad, 3 Idiots}

^{How we say it... "Study not just to memorize and get high grades. Getting high grades is good but going to school should be for the love of learning and understanding.}^{Know what is important and essential. Do your very best in your studies and success would surely come."}

^{We encourage him to study very well to be accomplished in the future. We teach him to know how to explain things in his words and help him study in his own pace.}

^{We don't pressure him to get awards or be included in the honor roll. If he gets one, it would be a great blessing and his hard work would be highly appreciated. If he gets low in his tests or makes mistakes, we always tell him that it's okay as long as he learns something from the experience and do his best next time.}

^{We are very fortunate that Ross is driven when it comes to his studies. His hard work gets positive results and it gives him more inspiration to do his best in everything that he does.}

^{3) ENJOY}

"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your actions."---Dalai Lama XIV

^{How we say it... "Happiness is a choice. It is only you who can make yourself happy. Have fun learning and make friends! Do everything that would make you happy as long as you don't hurt others or break school rules!"}

^{Aside from telling him that his academic performance is his topmost priority, we also let him try different activities like sports, art, music, and other foreign language that he finds engaging and enjoyable. We make sure that these activities would not hinder his focus in academics. We support him all the way to make him a well-rounded person. We let him make his own choice. We are always around to guide him and not to dictate what he should do. We also involve him in decision-making when it comes to his studies. It gives him the sense of responsibility and confidence.}

^{Ross enjoys school so much. He looks forward to it everyday! Every night when I tuck him to bed, he would tell interesting stories about new things he learned from his teacher,}
topics that he talked about with his friends,
his new endeavors, and new books that he read from the library.

Above all these, it is very important that we, parents, practice what we preach. Being role models to our kids is still the best way to teach them just like our parents did.

October 19, 2013- Happiness Overload at MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT

October 23, 2013

Last October 18, I received an invite from Miss MJ of MARS Ideas Inc. stating that I would have a chance to experience MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT on the October 19. I didn't hesitate to accept the invitation because I knew that my eldest son would surely enjoy it so much!

After confirming, I was sent another e-mail stating that I should fill-up and submit the form. After doing so, I received another e-mail acknowledging my confirmation which included four attachments for printing: the flyer of the event on October 19, the map of the pick-up point, waiver for signing, event guidelines , and of course the e-ticket!

All the things that I needed to know and what to prepare were already there! No need to ask questions. Wow, the team members were very organized! I had a nice first impression on them!

I told Ross to sleep early. I decided not to squeal our Saturdate. He would not sleep the whole night due to too much excitement.

The next day, I told him to dress up and briefed him about what would transpire during our trip while we were on our way to the pick-up point!

As I did the briefing, I could see the glow and excitement in his eyes! He was so enthusiastic and he couldn't wait to start the adventure.

Let me give you the details of our mom and son date at MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT...

PICK-UP POINT

As I mentioned earlier, the map of the pick-up point was sent as an attachment to the confirmation e-mail. It was clear and easy to follow. Locating the bus was hassle-free too! Well, going to the location earlier helped. We didn't want to panic nor be in a hurry. We arrived at the location at exactly 11:30 AM, just right on time as stated in the event guidelines.

By the way, PICK UP POINT IS AT BANK DRIVE, ORTIGAS CENTER PASIG CITY BEHIND SM MEGAMALL A!

WAITING TIME AT THE BUS

I was impressed with the bus. It was new, comfortable, smelled nice, and WIFI ready too! The temperature was just right---not too cold nor hot. We were warmly welcomed by the staff with friendly smiles on their faces. Miss Ann, one of the organizers, gave us free copies of Smart Parenting and Travelife Magazines plus flyers from sponsors after receiving and checking our e-ticket.

When there were three pairs of moms and kids already, the television was immediately turned on so that the kids could watch Ice Age while moms read the magazines and filled-up the stubs for the raffle. It gave us things to do while waiting for others to arrive. At exactly 12:10 PM, the bus headed off to our first stop! Miss Ann did the briefing and made sure that all of us were okay.

1ST STOP: The Picture Company- Rockwell

We were asked to bring our valuables and lined up as we moved to our first stop. As we entered The Picture Company, I observed that all moms and kids were very, very excited! We were asked to stay in one of the rooms were Miss MJ led the getting to know portion. She asked the kids to introduce themselves and their moms/dads. Then Miss Nikki, the branch manager, gave a short briefing about the logistics of the pictorial including how and when we could get free hard copies of our chosen photo. Parents were encouraged to choose among the nice props and costumes so that the kids could look their best during the pictorial.

There was no dull moment with the kids. It was an opportunity for them to get to know one another. While waiting for their pictorial, they chat and played together while we, parents, were very busy choosing costumes and props, and dolling-up or looking after our kids.

The pictorial was fun! It went well. The best pair (the most photogenic mom and kid) was chosen--- Miss Che and her adorable daughter, Chelsea. They won a prize from The Picture Company! Isn't it cool?

Then we were asked to return to the bus and get ready for our 2nd stop! We were given free Del Monte Juice to quench our thirst! The staff was helpful enough to collect our trash after our snack time.

2ND STOP: Mabuhay Restop

Mabuhay Restop was near the Jose Rizal Monument in Luneta. There was no traffic and we arrived on time as expected. We watched "Halo Halo Win" stage play, written by Nestor U. Torre with Music Composed by Ryan Cayabyab. Both adults and kids enjoyed the play---in short it was well-written and well-performed that we didn't realize it was time for us to go to our 3rd stop! It was indeed an awesome performance! Many lessons could be learned from the play like loving your siblings, honesty, fairness, bravery, reliance, integrity, empathy, and much, much more!

Before we left the place, the kids had their trick-or-treat too! Oh! The smiles and joy on the kids' faces were priceless!

3RD STOP: CCA Manila

It was a long trip from Luneta to CCA Manila in Katipunan but the staff made sure to sustain our growing excitement. They facilitated a raffle and gave fabulous prizes from the sponsors.

They asked Zoe and Chelsea to sing for us and both of them were given Center for Pop Music Philippines Gift Certificates to hone their talent in singing! New best buddies Zack and Tobby also won gift certificates from Coach and Kids Taekwondo! They were so excited to attend their Taekwondo class together!

If kids could sing very well, mommies too! We would not let our kids beat us! Mommies Rose and Ada sang their hearts out as we approached CCA Manila. :)

Loot bags were distributed as we went down the bus. We already brought all our belongings with us because this was our last stop/ DROP OFF POINT. We didn't have to ride the bus after our cookie decorating session.

Kids couldn't hide their delight when they entered CCA Manila. They couldn't wait to start! The place was sophisticated and comfortable. Even from afar, we could see and hear the demo by the pastry chefs clearly through the big television in front. Each of us was given a set of apron, toque, and hand towel. We all looked like professional pastry chefs.

The cooking room on the third floor was clean and tidy. We were asked to be in groups of three. All our materials were prepared and we all had ample spaces to work to. We followed what the chefs taught us! It was so cool!

We did cleaning up as we went. Miss MJ had a wrapping-up of what transpired during the day and we had a group picture taking afterwards.

We all went home with happy thoughts. This was indeed an event to remember. It was all worth it!

We were still euphoric at dinner time. When I asked Ross about what his most favorite part of the trip, he said "EVERYTHING!!!!" with gusto.

Imagine in just Php 750 parents had a chance to have a special one-of a-kind bonding moment with their kids at the same time meet new friends, get fabulous prizes and freebies, and new good memories to keep.

Kudos to the creative and dynamic MARS Ideas Inc. Team for creating this unique, unforgettable, and fun event!

I encourage all parents out there to let your kids experience MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT! You may also invite your family friends to join you to make it more enjoyable!

Click THIS to know more details about MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT's upcoming events this October, how to join, how to avail free tickets, and links to MARS Ideas Inc.'s Social Media Sites for latest posts and updates regarding new events this November.

Click THIS to see more photos!

Photo Credits: MARS Ideas Inc./ MOM and ME

Hey, I'm Still Here!

How "The Undo List by Alu Aluzan-Aran" Changed Me

Happy Mother's Day!

Teachable Moment: Honesty is the Best Policy

Our Three Basic Rules for Our Son's School Success

October 19, 2013- Happiness Overload at MOM AND ME FUN CIRCUIT

SJ Valdez

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