All-Around Pinay Mama

Teachable Moment: Honesty is the Best Policy

November 10, 2013

Last August 2013, my husband composed an e-mail to CEM (Center for Education Measurement) stating that he was following up the approval of his submitted test items that he made about Grade 3 Science for next year's Achievement Test. His e-mail was immediately acknowledged and he was informed that the test items were approved.

I: "Papa, it's finally done! Congratulations! Did you delete the soft copy?"

Hector: "Yes, Ma! It's done!"

Kuya Ross: "Mama, what is Papa doing? What soft copy did he delete? What is it all about?"

I: "Anak, Papa was invited by CEM to write test items about Grade 3 Science to be taken by students in the Philippines. According to the contract, once those test items were submitted to CEM, Papa should delete both his soft and hard copies and he did it!"

Kuya Ross: "How would they know if Papa really deleted them? They were not looking?"

I: " Anak, we have to be honest. Being honest means you should be true to your words and actions. You have to do the right thing even if nobody or regardless who is looking. The test that Papa made will be taken by you too next year. Papa could have saved a copy for you so that you'd know the answers but he didn't because that was cheating! Cheating is wrong, right? What he did was he kept his promise to CEM and followed the contract."

Kuya Ross: "Oh, I see."

I: " When you see money in your classroom, will you keep it?"

Kuya Ross: "No, Mama. I will give it to my teacher so that she can ask or look for the owner of the money."

I: "Very good! It's the same as what Papa did. It's an act of honesty. When we are honest, Kuya, people will trust us. God will be happy too because we are doing the right thing."

Kuya Ross: "Yes, Mama. I'm so proud of Papa."

I: "We are proud of you too, Kuya. You have to keep it in mind so that when you are already a dad, you'd know how to teach your kids."

Kuya Ross: "Yes, Mama. Thanks!"

The smile on his face showed that he was happy with what his Papa did.

Experience is really the best teacher at the right place and time.

Courtesy: http://www.nadiyahvidsten.com

Our Three Basic Rules for Our Son's School Success

November 08, 2013

I worked as a grade school teacher in an exclusive school for boys for five years before I decided to be a stay-at-home-mom. I've seen students excel and fail. I felt proud when my students excel because it meant that my mode of teaching was effective but my heart broke to see some of my students fail after doing different interventions to help them.

Frankly speaking, I understood more the situation and feelings of my students when my eldest son, Ross, started to attend school.

I realized that school pays an important part in students' development but parents' behavior have a greater impact in their children's behavior towards school.

Our children is the reflection of our behavior and attitude--- the way we treat others, our concept of right and wrong, the consistency of our actions with our words, our ways of dealing with anger, and most importantly, the way we give expectations.

According to Mimi Hudson, Director of Community Programs, Family Services of North Shore, parental expectations affect our children's motivational and self-expectations. Our children succeed if given realistic expectations and they fail when faced with unrealistically high expectations. Their failure is due to pressure, anxiety, and discouragement when they don't live up with their parents' expectations.

In line with this, there were moments when my husband and I talked about how we were raised by our parents. To cut the story short, we realized that we enjoyed school and succeed because our parents guided us well.

To help Ross enjoy school and succeed too, we set three basic school rules for him. We still remind him everyday to follow these rules before sending him off to school. We also ask him to repeat them as we speak so that he would remember them by heart. What is good about him is he never complains and does his best to practice them.

1) BE GOOD

"One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself."---Confucius, Golden Rule

^{We say that..."If you are good to others, they would be good to you. But if you are bad to others, they would be bad to you."}

^We^{always remind him to treat everybody with respect, kindness, gentleness, patience, and courtesy. He must be grateful when people treat him kindly. He has to use "Magic Words" (polite expressions) in talking to his classmates, friends, teachers, and other members of the school community.}

^{We teach him the importance of sharing by offering his food during recess and lunch time or lending his school materials in case one of his classmates forgot to bring his own.}^{It is also nice for him to take an active part in giving his time and resources in outreach programs and activities. When his classmates ask for help, he should be ready to give a helping hand.}

^{He must religiously follow the}^{"Clean As You Go" campaign in school. He should help in keeping his surroundings clean to lessen the load of the staff in keeping the whole school clean and tidy.}

^{In group activities, he must see to it that each of his classmates have a share in the doing work.}

^{He must}^{act like a gentleman too. As early as now, we teach him proper decorum in public and ways of showing high regard to the elderly and women.}

^{2) DO YOUR BEST}

^{"Follow excellence and success will chase you..."---}^{Ranchoddas Chadchad, 3 Idiots}

^{How we say it... "Study not just to memorize and get high grades. Getting high grades is good but going to school should be for the love of learning and understanding.}^{Know what is important and essential. Do your very best in your studies and success would surely come."}

^{We encourage him to study very well to be accomplished in the future. We teach him to know how to explain things in his words and help him study in his own pace.}

^{We don't pressure him to get awards or be included in the honor roll. If he gets one, it would be a great blessing and his hard work would be highly appreciated. If he gets low in his tests or makes mistakes, we always tell him that it's okay as long as he learns something from the experience and do his best next time.}

^{We are very fortunate that Ross is driven when it comes to his studies. His hard work gets positive results and it gives him more inspiration to do his best in everything that he does.}

^{3) ENJOY}

"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your actions."---Dalai Lama XIV

^{How we say it... "Happiness is a choice. It is only you who can make yourself happy. Have fun learning and make friends! Do everything that would make you happy as long as you don't hurt others or break school rules!"}

^{Aside from telling him that his academic performance is his topmost priority, we also let him try different activities like sports, art, music, and other foreign language that he finds engaging and enjoyable. We make sure that these activities would not hinder his focus in academics. We support him all the way to make him a well-rounded person. We let him make his own choice. We are always around to guide him and not to dictate what he should do. We also involve him in decision-making when it comes to his studies. It gives him the sense of responsibility and confidence.}

^{Ross enjoys school so much. He looks forward to it everyday! Every night when I tuck him to bed, he would tell interesting stories about new things he learned from his teacher,}
topics that he talked about with his friends,
his new endeavors, and new books that he read from the library.

Above all these, it is very important that we, parents, practice what we preach. Being role models to our kids is still the best way to teach them just like our parents did.

Teachable Moment: Honesty is the Best Policy

Our Three Basic Rules for Our Son's School Success

SJ Valdez

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